This TikTok best describes me right now:
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT2XVRf55
it won’t let me embed it, so …
when I was a child, I was afraid of my dad because of his aggressive, unpredictable behavior. When I became a teenager, I started to rebel; “Who do you think you are?” I believed respect was to be earned and this way of thinking and difficulty understanding why there are hierarchies of respect we are bound to as a society is a real challenge. I feel on equal footing with everyone as a human, which has gotten me into trouble with doctors, etc. I tend to speak my mind. Also, I think I’m kind of perceived as rude which surprises me because I thought I was nice.
So, back to the phone call. It was a govt organization basically saying there was a complaint about my competence due to x mental health reason. I knew exactly who it was. This client had reported significant mental health symptoms to me and then when this resulted in a diagnosis, they called me a liar, accused me of making things up to fit a misdiagnosis, etc. This client had sent me an email accusing me of the exact wording of the complaint and was completely unhinged when she said it. I redacted it and sent it to the investigator, thinking this would clear me. I was asked all kinds off questions about my mental health and told I couldn’t lie because my records were being requested. Two days ago, I was told they hadn’t received my records, but until they do, I’m not allowed to practice. Also I will be monitored quarterly for a minimum of two years, and as the parting gesture into the weekend, They reported me to the board for sharing the redacted email. Yup.
So now what to do. Friday was a bad day. I was filled with panic and anxiety. I have been thinking of closing my business since the accident for a variety of reasons including but not limited to financial and clientele I serve. Now, I feel like I have no choice.
I rescinded the ROI for my therapist, so I can figure this out.
I get it. I have mental illness. Does that mean I’m unfit to practice? I don’t know anymore.
